


Sapporo Breeze

by littlealex



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, KAT-TUN (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-10-12
Updated: 2009-10-12
Packaged: 2017-10-12 07:18:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/122309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlealex/pseuds/littlealex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A moment's quiet during a hectic concert schedule is just what the doctor ordered.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sapporo Breeze

**Author's Note:**

> Written as part of a drabble prompts to help unstick my mind, this would not be here if it weren't for pithetaphish, who asked for "Akame and happiness - end of summer, downtime between concert dates, Hokkaido?".

Night was falling around them, the last hours of sunlight being sucked out of the first day they'd had to relax in months, and Kame could feel the warmth escaping the air with it. The only place he still felt warm was his back, where it rested against Jin's, sharing body heat through thin layers of material. He wasn't sure how long they had been sitting there, or even if Jin was still awake, but he enjoyed the peace and quiet. They'd spent the day together, wandering the streets of Sapporo without saying more than a handful of words to one another ("look", "watch out", "wait", "can I?"). They didn't need words; they'd had enough words to last them a lifetime, between rehearsal meetings and choreography discussions and MC talks and fighting over the best bento backstage, and they were tired of words.

They were tired of everything, really, and the exhaustion had settled into Kame's bones the moment they'd sat on the patch of grass in the pocket handkerchief-sized park. Kame didn't look as tired as he felt, but Jin's body always betrayed him and gave him away. His face was pale and drawn, his eyes were puffy and wouldn't stay open, his movements were sloppy, and his bones protruded; he looked like a cancer patient, especially with a sheen of sweat that his pale face made look more like a cold sweat than a hot one, and everyone worried. They all tried to hide it, of course, in their own inimitable ways - Ueda picked fights with him, Nakamaru kept staring at him with a frown, Junno made his stupidest jokes at lunch time, and Koki insulted his hats - but Kame could read the worry behind their words.

Kame was the only one who could say anything, though. The others didn't want to, because they didn't want to deal with the fallout, but Kame had been through this before: both being the one running himself into the ground and the one watching Jin do the same. And it wasn't that he didn't worry about Jin - he watched every failed choreography movement and every trip to the bathroom and every grain of rice uneaten closer than anyone else - but he wasn't going to make the mistake of pressing the issue. Jin was an idiot, but he wasn't self-destructive. Suggesting he was would just make him close off, and Kame didn't want to do that in case there was something to talk about.

So they sat now, wordless, Kame counting the heartbeats he could feel where their backs touched, keeping track of the breaths, as the air swirled and changed around them. A shiver ran up Jin's spine and Kame smiled to himself. "Cold?" he asked quietly, turning his head so that the wind would carry his voice in the right direction. He watched as Jin's fingers flexed in the grass beneath them, stretching out first and then closing around the green blades, dirt hitching up beneath his fingernails before he let go.

"A little." Jin's voice was quiet, too, low and subdued. Kame watched his fingers play distractedly with the grass for a moment before reaching over to press his own hand over Jin's. The fingers stilled, dead for a moment before they flexed again, ducking into the spaces between Kame's fingers and curling gently around them. Kame smiled again and pressed his mouth to his shoulder, just watching their hands in the glowing twilight.

"Want to go back?" Kame mumbled against his shirt, loud enough for Jin to hear but muffled enough for him to ignore it as well. Jin didn't answer for a while, his breathing steady and his back rising and falling against Kame's, his thumb running lightly along the line of Kame's. The wind rustled the leaves and swirled between them, the cool air catching beneath their clothes and prompting Jin to answer with a quick nod.

Kame nodded as well, once and firmly, sliding his fingers out from beneath Jin's palm, and shifted away to stand up. The cool air felt worse now that there was no body heat to be shared, no back against his own, but Jin reached out once they were standing, linking their hands together again and Kame couldn't object. The warmth between their hands radiated outwards and Kame found himself walking closer beside Jin as they left the park, if only to keep himself warm.

They were almost a block from their hotel (taking the back roads and alley ways and side streets not only because they were more interesting) when Jin stopped in his tracks. Kame looked at him quizzically, because even though they'd been talking in gestures and motions all day, he didn't know what this one meant - there were no cars to watch out for, nothing interesting to look at, not even an alley cat to notice. Jin didn't look at him for a moment, just stared at the pavement by his feet, before he looked up, pushing his sunglasses over his head.

"I'm okay, you know," he said, eyes meeting Kame's for the first time in what must have been ages with the way Kame's chest burned at the connection. Kame tried to school his features into an innocent look, to try and hide the concern the way everyone else hid behind jokes and insults and fights, but he caught himself. Jin could read him even better than he could read Jin, so there was no point in trying to hide it.

"Are you happy, though?" This was the only question Kame really had. He wasn't worried that Jin was starving himself, or had pneumonia, or was partying too hard, or taking too many drugs, or whatever it was that people thought was going on. He knew it was just the effects of the tour taking its toll, and what he was worried about wasn't that Jin was working too hard, but that he might be hating it.

Inexplicably, Jin smiled. He smiled at first, and then he laughed, his free hand pressing over his stomach as the laughter bubbled from deep inside. Kame might have been concerned that it was the beginning of a breakdown, but it was not the laughter of a broken man. The laughter tapered off and Jin just smiled again, warm and friendly and shining as brightly as Kame remembered he could, even if his face was still drawn and pale.

"I'm happy," he said simply, leaning forward quickly to press a kiss to the curve of Kame's mouth. "I'm tired, I'm hot, I've had two summer colds already, and I'm getting sick of being away from Tokyo and home and my own bed. But if I wasn't happy, I wouldn't be here. I would have gotten on a plane again. You know that."

Kame did know that, but he had stopped letting himself think about the possibility more than a year ago. He couldn't let it be a possibility, because it hung over his head and stung him at all the wrong moments, so he'd stopped thinking about it. Just like he'd stopped thinking he had an out years ago, before they'd even debuted, he'd given up thinking there was anything else. It made him happier to see it that way, but the one thing he both loved and hated about Jin was that Jin always knew he had an escape route. Jin knew how much the escape cost, and weighed the highs and lows against each day he experienced, but it was always there for him. Even though it wasn't there for anyone else.

"I know," Kame said after a moment, a smile making its way slowly onto his lips as he realized the sparkle hadn't faded from Jin's eyes even though his smile wasn't quite as bright. Kame tightened his fingers around around Jin's and nodded once before leaning in to return the kiss, soft and sweet with a hint of teeth dragging over Jin's lower lip as he pulled back.

"I'm trying," Jin whispered, free hand tugging Kame closer by the waist as he looked down at Kame's shoulder. His voice didn't escape into the alley, but stuck between them, making Kame hold his breath lest the secret escape. "Summer's no good. Winter too. They ruin me and I know it shows. I'm trying, though."

Kame's heart constricted, his throat as well, and he sucked in a breath to keep himself from giving in to the irrational desire to cry. Jin was fine, he knew that. And now he knew that Jin was happy. But what was difficult to know was that Jin was only trying to be perfect. It made all the flaws more obvious, and Kame wanted to tell Jin to not bother trying, to give up the game and let everyone know how bad things were, but he knew Jin wouldn't listen. That's not who he was - it wasn't really who Kame was, either, but the person he sometimes wished he could be - and even if Jin agreed that it was pointless, it wouldn't stop him trying.

"I know," Kame said, once he had managed to swallow away the lump in his throat. "But promise me when we get back to Tokyo, you will sleep in your own bed for at least three days and let me bring you things."

Jin looked up, the smile on his face replaced by a smirk that Kame knew all too well, a distinct pink shade to the sparkle in his eyes. "As long as one of those things is orgasms, I promise."

Even though Kame had been expecting it, he swatted at Jin and pulled away. He kept his fingers twined with Jin's, though, and tugged him further down the alley way. "Come on, let's order some room service and see if we can't do something about your other request."


End file.
